The thing that always kept me Going
by Insert a Catchy Penname Here
Summary: He was the thing that always kept me going. And that was because he was Jacob. He was my Jake. Jaward


The thing that always kept me Going

Author Note: Hello. I am just finishing up **Breaking Dawn**, and so I decided that it was time to put myself out into the Twilight fanfiction writing-world! This is somewhat important information: I AM TEAM JADWARD! I can see her with both, I love both equally, so I will therefore write about both. ^_^ This is Team Jacob because before I realized I liked Team Edward I was a Team Jacob. Enjoy!

Oh yeah, this takes place after New Moon.

**Bella's Point of View **

The hole had been healed.

Don't ever get me wrong, I'd always had the hole in my chest. The one Edward made in it when he just disappeared out of my life.

But then Jacob came along.

He healed the hole, it was like it'd never even been there.

He'd fallen in love with me and I'd fallen in love with him. It was just how we fit together, how we were destined to be. It's just how we were.

Then Edward came back.

And the hole vanished completely. Jacob was suddenly not as important, it was just…complicated. I needed Edward, but I wanted Jacob. They both needed to be a part of my life. But I didn't know how I could possibly do that with Edward being so freaking jealous. And Jacob was jealous to pieces over him, so what was I going to do?

They were at war. At war with themselves who'd get me. But we all knew who'd already won.

"Bella?" Edward's purr brought me out of my train of thoughts.

"Yeah," I wasn't really paying attention to him, my mind was focused on my best friend.

"Are you alright?" even though he knew the answer that question, he still felt the need to ask.

"I'll be right back," I put my hands out, pushing the back of his neck so his head lowered to allow his lips to attack to mine, "I promise."

Nodding slowly, his body went slightly rigid as he stretched out my bed. I eased out of the house without Charlie knowing, slipping into my truck. I cursed with the old rusty roared and coughed, shuddering with age and rust. Luckily, Charlie was a heavy sleeper, so I was able to putter down the road.

I was too desperate to see him to ask whether or not he was home or ask permission from Billy. I parked into the shadows so's not be seen before heading to back of the house. Desperatley, I clawed my way up the side of the house, trashing my nails compleley and wounding my feeble fingers. Finally, I hosted myself into the window to collapse on his floor.

Jacob sat up with a start.

"Sorry for waking you up," I mumbled into the carpet.

"What the heck, Bells?" I felt his fever-hot hands on my upper torso for just a moment before I was sitting on his bed, lamp on and him staring at my nails, "gross, what did you do them? Oh yeah, you CLIMBED UP THE SIDE OF MY FREAKING HOUSE AT 2 AM!" I flinched at his angry voice, even though you'd think I'd be used to it by now.

"I wanted to see you," I flung myself into his chest, feeling hot instantly as I did so. I just clung to him, not allowing him to pry me off.

He just went with after one fail, securing his arms around me tightly. I was sweating with all his warmth, but I allowed it, burying my face in his chest. Tears slipped down my cheeks and onto his bare chest as my body trembled slightly. When he let go, he swiped away the tearflow and held my hands, rubbing my palms gently with his thumbs. This was probably the most sensitive that I'd ever seen Jacob Black.

"Well, you saw me," and there was that humor again, "now what?"

"I need you," my voice was so soft he could probably only hear because he was a werewolf.

"And I need you," his forehead connected with mine, "but you are with Edward. So why bother with me?"

"Because you're the one who saved me," I cupped his chin in my hands, "you're the one who brought me back into the real world. You're the one whom I'll love like no other. But Edward…he's just a part of me."

"It's complicated, and I'm never going to stop trying," he promised me, "you'll be ready one of these days to see that you belong with me."

I bit my lower lip. All I wanted to do was protect him, make sure he never got hurt. But that's all I could do to him, and yet he just kept on loving me.

"Tell me when you realize I'm a horrible person," I sighed, pressing my face in his fiery neck.

"That's a deal," he pulled my face away so I could cuddle with him, "but tell me something, Bell."

"Hmh?"

"Why do you love me so much?"

That was a question I asked myself daily. But I knew the answer every time.

"I love Edward because he is everything I'm not, and it's like he's my other half," I told him, "but I love _you _because you're too much like me. You really get me and you know I how I work. I love you because you're my best friend."

"Well, it's nice to know somebody loves the wolf boy," he suddenly pulled me into his lap, "you're welcome to stay the night with me."

"I need to get back to your enimies house tonight, sorry," I brushed some of his hair out of his sad eyes, "but I will one night."

"I'll hold you to that," he warned, taking my hair and pushing it behind my back to he could caress my face. My skin tingled in pleasure as I chuckled.

"Wouldn't expect anything less," I agreed, reaching out to trace patterns across his chest. It was so warm and comforting, and I wanted so bad to just fall into the feeling of nothing would get me and strong arms would protect…

Suddenly, a giggle escaped his lips. Alarmed, I let my hand fall so I could pull back to stare at him. His cheeks were redder than the sun as he dropped his head, ashamed and obviously embarrassed.

"What," I asked, trying not to smile, "was _that_?"

"Urm.." he squirmed a bit, "I'm kind of ticklish."

"I'll to remember it," I couldn't hold back the laughter at my silly best friend. His blushing only deepened as I pushed him onto the bed, moving my fingers all around upper torso to find out if I could make him giggle again.

And boy, did I ever.

Finally he lifted me up off him and held me upside down. I instantly squealed in surprise, struggling against his arms. He laid me on his bed and got ontop of me, pressing his nose to mine and his lips just an inch from mine. Feeling like this was just the time to do it, I allowed this kiss.

When his lips retreated, he lifted me up again and held me in his arms. I knew the time was getting late and that Edward would be wondering where I was by now. But things just felt so right at this moment, at this time, with Jacob holding me so in love.

Before I could tell him I had to go, he was suddenly carrying me. My eyes bugged out as I struggled, surprised and giving a little yelp. He walked me right down the street to my truck, sitting me in the passenger seat. Before I could stop him, we were at my house.

"Thanks," I grumbled a bit.

"No problem," he lifted me out and set me out my feet, "you deserved that for embarrassing me."

"Karma," I stuck out my lower lip in mock pout, and I upturned my lips before giving them a little kiss.

"Right here," he then patted his cheek with one finger, leaning in and closing his eyes. In response I pinched it, receiving a yelp and little whimper, "What was that for?"

"Goodnight, Jake," rolling my eyes, I headed into the house.

"Night, Bells," and like that he was gone, and moments later I heard a howl echoing in the distance.

When I was back with Edward, I didn't say anything about that. He didn't press me, though I had a feeling he knew. As he was singing my lullaby, I thought about Jake. He was mine, and nobody else could ever love him. Destiny was telling me we'd be a part of each other one day. One day really soon. It just wouldn't spill as to how.

He was the thing that always kept me going.

And that was because he was Jacob.

He was my Jake.

Author Note: Please review, they are accepted with waiting arms! ^_^


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